Confucius @ 6

保罗不是死的

2008-07-12T01:52:00.000-07:00

Though you may think you hear “Paul is dead,” backwards, it’s folklore combined with mind altering substances.

A society will come to be that will call itself great, but it will produce foods specifically for its pets. That’s sounds kooky to me. Great companies will arise out of this “pet food” business. Can you imagine that?

Pot will be legal one day, but it will have worn out it’s welcome.

Why would you touch a girl, let alone kiss one?

“Cool” will one day mean more than kinda cold.

“Bad” will one day mean “good.” Where’s the logic?

Bees don’t really like you to take their honey.

Bees also don’t like their hives to be hit with sticks.

Bees can swarm and fly much faster than you’d think.

Bee stings really really really hurt.

Old age is called “ripe” when it is actually fermenting.

A word from the future comes to me - “Modem.” I can relate it to you but it makes no sense to me now. Perhaps it will make a connection for you in the future.

Never let anyone rip the hairs from your body, especially the shorter, curlier hairs.

少许喜欢夫人

2008-05-06T16:38:00.000-07:00

There is no greater love than the love of a boy for his puppy. Not a dog, a puppy.

Man may one day explore distant worlds, but he will never be able to transmit his voice or likeness from one place to another through the air like in waves or anything. That's just ridiculous.

My Uncle Fung seems a little bit like a lady. More than a little.

Being 16 is meaningless in a time when cars have yet to be invented.

The evil that lives in man comes exclusively from the endocrine gland.

A day will come when tiny German woman will advise others about themselves and their naked stuff. She will have the cutest little voice. So cute will her voice be that many will not heed her advice because they will be too busy laughing at that voice.

Latex is the material of the future. Invest now.

苦涩浆果

2008-04-26T01:20:00.000-07:00

Seeing where they come from, eggs should not be eaten.

Wise is the woman who...I'll have to come back to this one.

That which looks good, is not necessarily so. Especially those little red berries that grow by the fence at Grandmother's house. Very bitter.

Dragging a slender thread over your Dad's face while he is sleeping can be hours of fun.

Whenever your Mother takes you to "visit" the doctor, you're getting a shot (no matter what she tells you before you go).

That which elders explain to you badly is undoubtedly exciting. Sex is probably excellent!

Never eat berries, especially little red ones, that a dog has urination access to.

橡胶手套

2008-04-16T23:15:00.000-07:00

While searching through life's clutter, wear rubber gloves and never the mittens that your Mom has newly knitted. You may find a fresh one left behind by the cat.

The shiny coin spends just as well as the tarnished one. Though it usually tastes a little bit better.

Cover your mouth when you sneeze or cough (honestly, I didn't make that one up but it's good advice nonetheless).

You can catch more flies with sugar than you can with vinegar. Though dogshit seems to work best of all.

A man's greatness can be measured by the size of the fire that he can stamp out while barefoot.

鋭い目的

2008-04-09T23:45:00.000-07:00

Cheung Lee is a butthole.

Never search for a sharp object in the dark. No, I take that back - when searching for a sharp object in the dark, you will find it but not as you intended.

From time to time, you will see that I say, "man," when referring to people. I am not being sexist or exclusionary. I am merely expressing myself in the verbal style of my times. So, please women, don't be hissy. I know how you can get.

If you think living up to your older sibling is difficult, try being my little brother.